Graceland

One thing I really dislike doing is talking or writing about myself. Therefore, I’m not going to do it and instead I’ll write about someone else! Because it’s easier and more fun! For this blog I’d like to write about my younger sister, Kristen – partly because I’d like to document a special time that I recently enjoyed with her and partly because I am really proud of her.

As you might know from following the blog or Kristen on Facebook, she moved to Tennessee shortly after she graduated last summer. She was accepted into Teach For America (TFA) and received her assignment teaching in an inner city school in Memphis. Her acceptance alone was something to be celebrated as the program only accepts roughly 10% of all applicants. Anyway, while many of her peers were probably moving back in with mom and dad or planning their party plans for the entire summer until they either went to graduate school or decided to look for a “real” job, Kristen packed up her shoddy car that she bought from our father and drove down to Memphis all by herself.

Fast forward about 6-7 months when I decided that I should visit my younger sister before I give birth to our first little bambino and circumstances make it just a wee bit harder to travel. I had been keeping up with Kristen and the struggles and joys she had experienced during her first 6 months of teaching through her daily snapchats, texts, and phone calls. I’d also been able to learn a little bit about the culture and history surrounding Memphis through her weekend adventures exploring the city or the way in which she started incorporating the local lingo into her own vocabulary. But, I wanted to experience some of all of this first hand so over President’s Day Weekend 2016 I, along with my best friend Naomi, made my first trip to the city of blues and barbeque.

Of course, any time that I spend with my sisters is going to be a good time. We could travel to one of the worst cities in the US for a vacation together and still have a good time exploring. However, I really enjoyed the city of Memphis. I’d been to Nashville numerous times as my first duty station was only 40 minutes from there and always enjoyed that city as well but Memphis was just different. I think its personality just fit me better. It seemed a bit more raw, more vulnerable, more genuine, and less touristy, less star struck. As I said above, part of the reason I wanted to write this blog was to document our time together in Memphis so here’s a quick recap of our adventures.

Naomi and I got there late on Thursday evening. Kristen picked us up from the airport and we didn’t really do much that night besides check out her apartment, meet her kitty named Libby, and hit the hay. Kristen had to work on Friday and Naomi and I were tired from traveling. Friday morning Kristen headed to work while we slept in, drank coffee, and took our time getting ready. After Naomi and I were ready for the day, we walked from Kristen’s apartment to downtown Memphis for breakfast. We found this cute little coffee shop called Tamp and Tap where I got a peanut butter and banana toast (in honor of Elvis!) and Naomi got a yummy spinach salad. After we finished, we called an Uber to take us to visit Kristen at her school.

Seeing Ms. Alesch at school was probably the highlight of my trip. From when we first entered the cafeteria at Fairly High School, it was extremely evident that her students respected and loved her. We couldn’t walk two steps in the lunch room without hearing, “Ms. Alesch!” And it was the same in her classroom. It also happened to be Valentine’s Day weekend so Ms. Alesch’s Spanish class was learning words related to love. One of the students wrote on the board, “Te amo (or yo quiero, I can’t remember) Ms. Alesch.” Naomi and I sat and observed in the back of the classroom while I admired my baby sister as she led the classroom with her genuine love for the students.

After school, Kristen gave us a quick driving tour of Memphis and then we went back to her apartment for a little while to philosophize about her students before we went to dinner that evening. For dinner, we had to try a BBQ place seeing as we were in the city of BBQ so we went to one of Kristen’s favorite places – Central BBQ. It was quite delicious and laid back. It was one of those places where you ordered at the counter and they brought your food out to your table. The food was really great but Kristen definitely picked the best thing off the menu when she ordered the BBQ nachos. I think we had big plans to go out after that but we were too tired so we just went home and decided to save Beale Street for the next night.

On Saturday morning, Kristen and I went to her Crossfit gym and squeezed in a pretty good partner workout. Much to Rocko’s chagrin, we completed a kickass amount of wall balls and other exercises while Naomi cheered. After showering, we then got breakfast at another cute joint downtown – Atomic Slim’s. Naomi and Kristen had plenty of mimosas and the food was delightful. Kristen and I split a plate of some of the best pancakes (again, peanut butter and banana in honor of Elvis) I have ever had.

With our bellies full, we proceeded to our next event of the day which was the Backbeat Mojo Tour! I had read about this tour in the New York Times and it was definitely worth it. The tour guide not only told you about the history of the city (much better history than Nashville in my opinion!) as you rode around in a bus, but he also sang songs and played his guitar to aid with the story telling. If you ever go to Memphis, I would highly recommend this tour! After the tour, we stopped in at the Peabody Hotel to view the ducks on parade. I’ll let you do the research but it’s basically a 90 year tradition that occurs daily at one of the nicest hotels in Memphis. While we waited we had coffee, tea, and cookies.

After the ducks on parade, we stopped for a drink on Beale Street. Obviously, a pregnant lady probably wasn’t the best guest to be taking to wild and crazy Beale Street but we went at 5pm and only had one drink and fried pickles. It was enough to experience some of the atmosphere and live music anyway. Maybe next time I visit Memphis, I’ll make more of a night of it. We then went to eat at the Memphis Pizza Café where I think we each ate an entire pizza because it was so good and we were hungry from touring all day.

Sunday was our last full day there. We started off the day at Graceland where I quickly fell in love with Elvis (Naomi and Kristen were already in love before the trip). I promptly understood the world’s fascination with the King and by the end of the tour found myself hoping the rumors of him still being alive were true. This is definitely a MUST SEE if you venture to Memphis. After Graceland we toured the National Civil Rights Museum, also a MUST SEE. During the tour, you get to see the exact room where Martin Luther King Jr. was staying at the Lorraine Motel when he was shot. It was a very humbling, somber experience and I shed some tears as I walked by his room. For dinner that night we went to one of Kristen’s favorite places, Babalu, for tapas and tacos. I could have eaten the tableside guacamole there for days but instead opted to get ice cream after dinner at a cute, local place called Sweet Noshings.

And that was it. Before we knew it, it was Monday morning and Kristen was dropping us off at the airport at 5am. We were sad to leave but left feeling content with our dose of Memphis culture and our hearts and memory banks were full of plenty of laughs and stories that I didn’t even get into for this blog.

Now for my second reason for writing this blog. As I said above, I’m extremely proud of Kristen and the woman that she has become. Without going into politics and regardless of your political views you’ve no doubt heard rhetoric this campaign season about electing a candidate who will work to decrease student loan debt, improve the economy so that college kids can get a job right after school instead of moving back in with mom and dad, or revamp the health care system in some way that would benefit you as the constituent. Again, I’m not going to get into politics here. I DO agree that there are flaws with all of the aforementioned systems. However, what I admire in Kristen and one of the reasons that I am so proud of her is that she has never expected anybody to fix her particular life situation for her. She has, for the most part, done it all herself. I think all of the Dissident Daughters will acknowledge that we are all certainly privileged in some ways and have been beyond blessed with the way we were raised and the gifts with which we were born. So I guess Kristen has not done it ALL by herself. But what I’m trying to acknowledge for this part is that she has had to overcome plenty despite her privilege and blessings. I thought about this each night that I stayed with her in her tiny, albeit adultish, definitely not a college dorm or bachelor pad, Memphis apartment.

Here was a young girl who could have just thrown her hands up after college about finding a job in “today’s economy”. Instead, she spent hours researching, applying, and interviewing for TFA. Here was a young girl who could have been too scared to move down to Memphis alone and instead moved back home with her mom. Instead, she packed up her lemon of a car, looked at a map, and just started driving. Here was a young girl who could have complained about repaying her student loan debt. Instead, she constantly asked for my advice and we worked on making her a budget. Here was a young girl who could have complained about being kicked off her parents’ health insurance at age 19. Instead, she worked her ass off to be able to join the military so that she could pay for their more affordable insurance on her own. Like I said, I am definitely not overlooking Kristen’s raw talent, blessings, and a little bit of privilege to be able to do all of this, nor am I saying that overcoming these things alone makes one “successful.” All I am saying is that she is one strong, young woman. I am proud of her and grateful to be experiencing her life journey with her.