We're Back! (AKA: Perks of the Pandemic)

Hello, blogging world! It's been awhile. We haven't been active on the blog for over a year for a variety of reasons. We went through a season of life where we posted regularly, and then, well, we went through a season of life where other engagements were higher on the priority list.

However, isolation and social distancing (or, as I prefer to call it, physical distancing) have changed our priorities once again. We miss collaborating with each other on this project. We miss connecting with others through writing. We miss having a medium for self-expression and creativity. 

And so, we are going to start our blog going again, and we are going to try and post once a week. I won't speak on behalf of the other sisters, but I hate that the blog wasn't a priority in the last year. I think that many of us are reevaluating how we spend our time and resources as a result of the imposed isolation from the pandemic, and I know that I need to spend more time with creativity and self-expression. I want the blog to be a priority even when we aren't hibernating in our houses to help save the world. Ah, yes. The pandemic- I have so many posts that I want to write regarding grief, theodicy, etc., but I will save those for the future! 

In the meantime, we want our first post to include our revised "About Me's." We realized that the last time we updated our profiles was when the blog was first started 6 years ago!!! 

So, without further ado, here are the authors and sisters of Dissident Daughters:


AMY SUE

I'm an Amy Sue of all trades, master of non. I'm a lover,not a hater, though sometimes I'm a rager. I think a lot about things- sometimes too much. Sometimes I feel like I can't love enough and sometimes I feel like I love too much. In my experience, most things are double-edged swords, happiness truly does lie in moderation, in wine there is truth, and life is about the joureny, not the destination. I am a work in progress and I hope I always am. I believe there is beauty and connection in vulnerability and imperfection. I believe in erring on the side of love. I see connection everywhere. I'm truly a sensitive person. I'm intuitive. 

I love words and music--separately and together. I love being outside-these three things are part of my spirit. I think women can be the epitome of true beauty. I'm not so sure about men. Wine, chocolate, and coffee are my three favorite things to ingest. I'm a late bloomer. I love myself more in my 40s-I wouldn't go back if I could. I have very beautiful, meaningful tattoos. I hope to have more. I have to relearn lessons I thought I had already mastered. I’ve learned, am learning, and will learn again that being human means hurting, apologizing, forgiving, patience, loving, and laughing. I know I don’t need or want to convince anyone of my worth. It’s there, if they can see it.


JILL

I don't know that I have much to say about myself. I'm the second oldest, and I have lived up to my birth order traits in that I have always been a bit insatiable, which in turn, causes me to sometimes do things that make absolutely no sense. I feel like I was a problem child compared to the rest of my siblings, and perhaps, to some degree, I still am. I'm searching but for what I do not honestly know. I'm in my early 40's (seriously, how the hell did that happen), and, to date, this decade of my life has been filled with contradictions. I have experienced the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. I have felt great love, yet deep sorrow; disabling despair yet intense joy; crippling anxiety yet calm peacefulness; severe depression yet immense hopefulness- sometimes all within the same day. I'm guess I'm experiencing what we would refer to in sports terminology as a "rebuilding year." Perhaps that explains some of my tumultuous behavior. 

I find myself holding different roles at different times, none of which I think I do particularly well. The most precious role to me is "Mom" to my son, Trevor, and my daughter, Brooklyn. I never thought this is what my life would look like but it's the only one I've got so I'm going with it and striving to be the best version of myself even if this is not what I had pictured. My life has been heavily influenced by my military experiences spanning 21 years. I retired in 2019, and as a result, gave up a large part of my identity. I guess I figured it would be easier to figure out life without the military while in my 40's as opposed to waiting another 10-15 years. In retrospect, if I am honest, I am not so sure I made the best decision. 

For the first time in my life, I feel like I can admit that I have truly no idea where I'm going or what I'm doing and sometimes I don't even know why I'm doing something I am doing. What used to seem so clear and obvious to me now appears hazy and uncertain. Here's what I do know: If I die tomorrow, I can honestly say, "Wow, that was one helluva fucking ride." 

MOLLY

I suppose I can start with my "official" descriptors: 

Daughter: Middle of the five of us. Yeup, I've pretty much got all of the stereotypical middle child traits: not as smart as the first two, not as cute or funny as the last two. Ha! 

Sister: I suppose I might be considered the logical, reasonable sister. 


Wife: Married to Larry in 2015 in one of our favorite places: St. John, USVI. I don't believe in "Soulmates" or "marrying your best friend" because it puts unrealistic expectations and standards on another person; I do believe marriage is choosing to fall in love with the same person over and over again. 

Mother: Blessed with the toughest, most humbling, and rewarding job on earth bringing up LJ (almost 4) and Adeline (18 months). 

Major: I've been in the army for almost 17 years as a logistics officer. I joined for the travel and education; I've stayed in for the people. 

Woman: i believe in the collective power and leadership of women. I've just recently started trying to discover the woman I was/am meant to be before I was tamed by the world (thanks Glennon Doyle!!) 

Now for the less structured description of myself... I usually cry once a day not because I am sad but "because the world is so beautiful and life is so short." I get anxiety thinking about all of the beautiful places in the world I have not yet seen or shown my children. Some of my favorite things are the moon, the outdoors, flowers, movement, food, coffee, dark chocolate, culture, and podcasts. In the end, I believe we are all pretty much the same: we are looking to connect to others, to love and be loved. 


ANNE

I was in somewhat of a tumultuous place in my life when we first started this blog. Those chaotic days have settled, and I have since discovered a strong degree of self-possession. Of course, that doesn't mean that I'm not continually growing, processing, and questioning, but I do think that I have a much stronger awareness of who I am continually called to be. 

I've been a bereavement counselor for UnityPoint Hospice for 6 years now. In our migrant culture, I know that it's a bit of an anomaly to be at the same position for 6 years. My career in grief support, however, is one of the most consistent aspects of my life. I cannot tell you how fulfilling it is to see people explore new possibilities and hope after stumbling around the brink of darkness. Moreover, my job has so much variety in terms of tasks, location, and schedule, that I am never bored. I can always create new methods and programs for supporting humanity in our multitude of losses. 

I still love to play almost more than anything else in the world. I do take life seriously- and actually, because I take life seriously- I'm continually looking for ways to imagine, create, banter, pretend, and satirize. I do this in every aspect of my life, including my career. I refuse to change who I am and what I value simply because I'm in a different context. Of course, some of my vocabulary and antics are slightly different, but the personality trait remains remarkably consistent. 

I'm incredibly active in aerial arts; I belong to a gym called "TGR Fitness" in Ankeny. I refer to it as my "church" and my "home away from home." I love that I can always challenge myself to grow and learn new skills; this is particularly salient in aerial arts because they are so darn difficult. Seriously, I'm still working on my aerial invert. I also love that my gum encourages play alongside this difficult art. We are always dressing up in costumes for shows and finding ways to express ourselves, and whenever I go there, it always feels like coming home. 

I've built a strong community in Des Moines, and I love that I am surrounded by so many amazing people. It definitely suits me to live alone and have time to charge my very introverted self, and yet, I am continually given the opportunity to connect with so many amazing people. I'm thankful for family, friends, coworkers, students, clients, etc. that give my life meaning and vibrancy. 

I try to live life with abundance. Sometimes, that means abundant joy, and sometimes, that means abundant sorrow. Sometimes it means abundant adventures, and other times, it means abundant anxiety. Regardless, the abundance signifies that I'm embracing this life that I was given, and I continue to co-create alongside others and God. 


KRISTEN

Hi, I'm Kristen. I am a child at heart. Too fitting given I am the youngest of five sister. I am one who sings, plays, laughs, and even speaks in different voices in front of the mirror from time to time. 

"A diamond in the rough" is how someone once described me and that is my truth. I am a brave and strong woman, yet also very afraid. I fear the passing of time and loss. That angst comes from only knowing what those two sentiments superficially feel like. 

I am a lover. I love fearlessly when I feel safe and secure. I love my family; there is nothing I wouldn't try and do for them. I tend to mask my insecurity with humor and deflection, although I am working on getting past that. I am now able to say "thank you" genuinely when people compliment me, and I do not feel as though I have to avoid or always reciprocate the notion. 

I am still trying to figure out life, one day at a time, and I am not sure I'll ever fully know "what I want to do with my life." Right now, I work at a Middle School in East San Jose, but that will not be my permanence. I don't believe in permanence because nothing in life is. We are changing beings that like to think some things in life will follow that same course, but that is a false sentiment. 

I am a risk taker. I enjoy making a move without quit knowing what the outcome will be. My dream is to be a foster parent one day. I want to be a mother of a child. I am passionate about our youth. I enjoy mentoring and teaching them with a balance of love and accountability. 

I have four nieces and nephews, and I care for them as I care for my students. One of my nephews is more like my brother, and I appreciate the dynamic of that relationship because I truly always wanted a younger brother. 

I understand that this "about me" kind of turned into an extremely rough draft of all my thoughts and that's me. "I am a work of art, but under construction yet for sure." Peace, love, and positive energy. Always.