30, Flirty, and __________ (Insert whatever the hell adjective makes sense for YOU)

 “My 30 goal is to be able to run 3 miles.”- Shanice Blair

 “My goal is to be the best mom I can be and help provide for my family. Pay off more debt. Set new fitness goals after baby. And start a new level at work when I return.”- Lesley Bielenberg

 

“In year 30 I’m working to improve my financial literacy and money habits. I hope to continue having a great first year of marriage and being able to celebrate milestones with friends and family.”- Crystal Olalde Graef

 

“Running a 3:45 marathon at Twin Cities.”- Skylar Young

 

“My goal at 30 is to get a policy job after my fellowship making 6 figures, and to set the financial foundation to buy a house.”- Kristen Alesch

 

“Get pregnant (& hopefully birth baby before I’m 31), pay off student loans (if the freeze is actually ended) and 3) buy 1^st investment property.”- Laura Major

 

All the individuals above, except for myself, are individuals I have had the privilege to meet and know along my own life journey <3.

 

J. Krishnamurti said, “The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.” In this life, we are expected to achieve certain spoken and unspoken “milestones.” By age 22 you should have your bachelor’s degree, by age 30 you should have a prospective life partner, by age 35 you better be expecting your first child at the least, etc. For some, they might fall into this timeline because life aligned this way for them, or they might have felt the pressure we all feel at times by the invisible expectations of society. For others, their lives might align differently because of their own individual desires, life experiences and choices.

 

I want to name, first and foremost, that there is not a “right” way to live life. Whatever your individual life looks like is unique to you and is exactly where you’re supposed to be in this present moment. What I do want to mention is that because everyone’s individual life journey is unique to them, we are not all going to be in the same place of our life journeys, regardless of our numerical age. As demonstrated above, 6 different 30-year-olds stated their goals for the year. Some desire to increase their levels of physical fitness while others focus on financial prosperity and strengthening their families. Although these individuals are the same age, they are at different phases in their life courses aiming to accomplish different things.

 

Again, I emphasize that there is no “correct” path in life. Each and every day, we make choices with the information we know at the time, the feelings within our minds and bodies, and the desires we hold in our hearts. One person’s path at age 30, 45, 62, etc. can look completely different from another person’s at that same age.

 

The differences outlined in each of our life journeys are so beautiful and are a compilation of the experiences which led us to get there. Although there are commonalities within the human experience (love, life, and loss), the age and rate at which we experience these commonalities vary. I recently watched a Netflix show called “Firefly Lane” which perfectly captures the human experience, and the uniqueness of our life paths. One quote that stood out to me in particular was the following, “But that’s the thing about big life changes. You don’t get to choose when they happen.” I appreciated this quote because in truth, we have control over so little in this lifetime. You attain your bachelor’s and master’s degree to find out the economy hit a recession and the job market is scarce. You move to a new city to focus on your career, and you fall in love. You have plans to take a family vacation in Florida and a family member gets sick. The uncontrollable life events all influence where we are at and where we are headed, and ultimately make our lives unique.

 

Now, I’m not saying to live life aimlessly because we cannot always control our circumstances. What I am saying is that every single person experiences life, and the commonalties of the human experience, at different ages and stages. With this in mind, when you feel inclined to judge someone else’s journey, or even your own, I encourage you to remind yourself that you are not the gate holder of all the knowledge and insight that it took for someone to get to where they are today. Be grateful for what you have, all you have become, and make choices that further your individual development. Then, let the rest go.