First of all, our apologies for taking a week off from the
blog! I’ll take the blame for it; it was my turn to write after all. In my
defense, last week was a crazy week coming off of the holiday weekend. Fourth
of July shenanigans coupled with all of my recent trips back and forth to Fort
Knox, Kentucky for the summer left me with little time or energy to write. Womp
womp. Sad face.
Anywhooooo, I’m back at it this week (obviously!). Last time
Jill blogged, she questioned whether or not anyone was actually following and
reading our blogs via our Facebook posts. The rest of us sisters collectively
agreed that we didn’t care whether or not even one person was reading them
because WE sisters sure as hell were reading all of them and that was worth it
in itself. We all live such different and sometimes distant (sister Kristen was
in Spain this summer and sister Jill just returned from a Disney Cruise) lives
and don’t get nearly enough time together to pontificate, rant, and
philosophize. We keep in touch as much as we can through group text and email
but it’s just nice every week to read a longer version of what is going on in
one sister’s life or mind for that particular writing.
Even though we sisters pretty much text or email daily, I’ve
been so busy that I don’t think any of them really know why I have been
traveling back and forth to Fort Knox. I’m finishing up an assignment in
Recruiting and have had to go there to essentially try to recruit ROTC Cadets
to join the Army National Guard upon graduating from college and commissioning
as a second lieutenant versus joining the Active Army or the Army Reserves. All
ROTC Cadets across the Nation attend this month long training at Fort Knox
between their junior and senior year so by making multiple trips I was pretty
much guaranteed to talk to every single Cadet that had any interest whatsoever
in joining the National Guard. Obviously, not ALL of them want to join the
Massachusetts National Guard specifically so I haven’t had to actually talk to
ALL of the cadets. With one rotation left, I’d say I’ve talked to maybe 125
Cadets. Of course me, being the Feminazi that I am (HAHA! See my last blog
post), took mental notes on the number and types of FEMALE cadets with whom I
spoke. By the way, I’m being facetious about the Feminazi reference- I didn’t
take mental notes just because I wanted something to complain about- I hope
that I AM and continue to be a female role model to other females so I want to
be aware of and informed about the tendencies and characteristics of the women
who are following in my footsteps, those whom I may one day mentor.
Like I said, I have already talked to about 125 Cadets. Out of
those 125, I’d say I have talked to MAYBE 20 females. I’m not exactly sure on
that number but I’d say its right around 15%. More importantly, out of that
15%, there were only TWO (2!) that were interested in jobs outside of Military
Intelligence, Medical Services, and Adjutant General (basically Human
Resources). Typically and traditionally, the aforementioned jobs involve more
office type work than other jobs in the Army and fewer chances to command large
groups of Soldiers. Most of the time (of course I am generalizing here for all
my Army friends reading this), Officers in these branches follow a career path
to become a Staff Officer rather than a Commanding Officer. A Staff Officer is
no less important and is still a leader but as a Commanding Officer one is
directly responsible for up to hundreds of Soldiers who fall under the command.
In the civilian world, a commanding office would be the equivalent to a CEO. Anyway, what I sort of deduced from all of
this was that none of the females came up to my table with the primary goal of
wanting to command someday at the higher levels. I just didn’t get the sense
from any of them that they wanted to BE IN CHARGE.
Now, I could be way off base here or just reading into
things way too much but either way, the whole situation had me thinking. Why
didn’t I get the sense from any of the female cadets that they wanted to BE IN
CHARGE? I surely sensed it from some, if not most, of the males. Hell, maybe
it’s just me and a jaded view? Maybe it was just the way in which I interacted
with the female cadets? But no, I think it has to be more than that. What? I
don’t know but I have read several articles since then that have got me
thinking even more. Sidebar: this is another great reason for writing this blog
even if it is only my sisters who read it- I get to share and reference
articles that I enjoy and think are important without always having to email
them separately. J
I thought back to my old days as a Cadet. I myself, never
really had much interest in being in charge to tell the truth. What changed
since then (because I definitely want to be in charge now), I don’t know. Maybe
I had a couple of really good mentors who told me I need to be in charge? Yes,
fact. Maybe I witnessed some really good female officers before me? Maybe I
witnessed and heard about numerous examples of accomplishments and
contributions by female officers? Well,
yes, that’s also true except to a lesser extent because 1) there just aren’t a
lot of female officers (we are only 15% of the force) out there in general and
2) here is where my opinion comes in, I don’t think we as females toot our own
horns, so to speak, as loudly and as often as we should! We don’t toot them for
our OWN achievements often enough and we sure as hell don’t toot them loud
enough, if even at all, for OTHER women as often as we should!
Hell, the United States Navy just named its first female
four-star admiral last week
and I barely heard
about it. If not for Huff Post Women on Facebook, I don’t think I would have
known about it. Furthermore, I failed to promote it myself! I should have been
sharing that shit all over Facebook but nary a word from one Molly Alesch! Even
one of my former male lieutenants was proud enough to share it! So that’s just
one problem- not sharing our own or other women’s accomplishments often enough
and loud enough. One of the other problems, I think, is that we use men as the
baseline or in other words, we neutralize men’s accomplishments. This article
really hits the nail on the head with that point:
The author discusses how during the World Cup, sports
commentators kept calling Landon Donovan the “all-time US leading goal scorer”
when in fact he is NOT. He is not even in the top five. He is the top MALE US
leading goal scorer but Abby Wambach blows him out of the water when it comes
to number of goals. Just check out the article. This blog is already too long
for me to explain it to you. J
Finally, I think that even when we as females DO try to toot
our own horns, we are often not heard because some men are too busy speaking
over us and discounting our contributions. We as women need to learn how to and
practice telling men to STOP INTERRUPTING US! Check it out:
Of course, I am once again generalizing. There are MANY men
in my personal AND work life who will listen to me without interrupting.
However, when Urban Dictionary includes the word “Mansplain” in its word list,
one can figure out that not enough men listen and respect women’s credentials
and contributions.
Anyway, by no means am I criticizing the females for not
wanting to be in charge. I understand that not everybody is like me and not
everybody wants to or is cut out to be in charge. However, I have to believe
that more than two of those females want to be in charge someday and more importantly,
have the tools to be in charge and make a difference by doing so. Furthermore,
research upon research has shown that organizations perform better if women are
part of the leadership. If we want to encourage women to move to the top or be
in charge in any of our organizations, military or civilian, I believe we need
to cheer each other on- toot your own horn and help other women toot theirs as
well. So ladies, start blowing!
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